“Finding Peace After Loss: A Real Life Guide to Healing From Grief”

Losing someone that you love is a truly life changing experience. I have chosen to write this guide with the aim of it being a compass and support through the healing process for those who may need it. I am sharing a real life testimony to the key steps that I have used to navigate through my own grief.

Grief is a natural response to loss, and loss shows up in many forms such as Divorce, Death, Diagnosis of Illness, Job Loss, Ending of Relationships including Friendhips etc, the list goes on. This article will be focusing specifically on healing from the loss/ transistioning of a loved one.

Grief can encompass a varied range of emotions, from disbelief and sadness to anger and guilt. Everyone’s experiences are always unique, therefore having the understanding that grief is a deep process that takes time is super important. Acknowledging and accepting your genuine feelings as part of this journey can be a strong step towards healing.

Steps towards Healing:

Acknowledge Your Loss: Once the initial shock subsides a bit recognising that your loss is real and not an awful nighmare (That your’re fighting/trying your best to wake up from) can be a painful yet very necessary step. Pause, grant yourself permission to grieve and allow yourself time, space and grace to understand the core impact of your loss to your life.

Find and Accept Support: You’re not an Island! Surround yourself with love, care and support from your family, friends, and definately consider going to Bereavement Councelling, general councelling and or joining a grief support group as sharing space and your feelings with others who are in a similar boat at the same time can provide a sincere comfort and boost your healing journey. I have added a small list of a Councelling services at the end of this article.

Find an Outlet to Express Your Feelings: There are several outlets for you to start to move grief out of your system. Expressing yourself and your emotions, is a truly effective and therepeutic medium (No pun intended) towards healing. Simply talking from the heart is always a great start, writing (my new personal favourite hence me joining Medium, and having the strength and foresight to write this guide), art, or even helping others (can change perspective and reates distance from your own pain).

Celebrate The Life and Memories of Your Loved One: I can be a powerful means to keep your loved ones memory alive by celebrating their life. Talk about the things that made you laughand also proud of them. Print, frame and display pictures of them that make you smile (this personally brings me the most comfort). Carry on their legacy by participating in activities they enjoyed, sponsoring a charity that they liked or if they passed from an illness maybe a charity that is working on the cure.

Spiritual practice: Step/study deeper into your spiritual practice or find one if you don’t already have one.

Find a New Normal: The biggest challenge can be accepting a new way of life without your loved one’s physical presence. Welcome the future carry the love and memories of your dearly departed as you manoeuvre forward into your future. Cherishing the precious memories of your loved one can be a source of major comfort and strength. Memories will help you find peace and new purpose as you learn your new normal.

Listen to Calm Music: In times when your mind is racing and shaking up your entire existence, listen to some calm music or nature sounds. Listening to Eric Roberson song “Couldn’t hear me/Def Ears, Live in DC” every night for two years after my son passed, was like a beautiful lullaby that got me to sleep for a peaceful nights rest.

Mindful Meditation: Dedicate a few minutes to meditation each morning. Mindful meditation is proven to enhance your emotional health, reduces stress and improve concentration. You can find plenty of guided meditations to help you on most listening platforms such as Spotify and Youtube etc

Conclusion: Healing from the grief of losing a beloved is a deeply personal and life shifting process. By acknowledging your loss, expressing your feelings, seeking support, celebrating their life and memories, balancing your mind & vibrations with calm music/sounds, and finding a new normal, you can shift onto a path towards your healing. Show yourself grace and remind yourself that it is ok to grieve, and to heal. You’re not alone on this journey.

Peace be with you x

Let’s talk, share your experiences and thoughts in the comments!

Councelling services:

https://www.betterhelp.com/ — BetterHelp was founded to remove the traditional barriers to therapy and make mental health care more accessible to everyone. Today, it is the world’s largest therapy service available in a convenient online format.

https://www.baatn.org.uk/ — The Black, African and Asian Therapy Network is the Home of the largest community of Counsellors and Psychotherapists of Black, African, Asian and Caribbean Heritage in the UK

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